Good Conversation

Posted on August 27, 2012 by Earlynn

Good conversation is a skill.  To develop good conversational skills, I suggest  three basic rules:

Rule number one – Don’t interrupt.  Be patient.  Listen.  Let them find the right word.  Don’t suggest words or finish their sentences.  Let them fully express themselves.

Rule number two – Never dominate the conversation out of harmony.  Pause after each statement  and wait for the other person to reply.  If the other person wants to speak, let it happen.  If the other person is content to let you continue, do so.  Be versatile.  If you sense the other person wishes to dominate the conversation, fall back and let it happen.  But if my conversational partner wants me to dominate, I step forward in the conversation and dominate more.  The key is to be flexible.

Rule number three – Connect with what is on the other person’s mind.  If asked where I went on my last vacation, I take a minute or two to tell the story of where I went.  Then I use that question as a clue  they may want to talk about where they went on their last vacation.  To repeat a bit of what the other has said, stimulates the conversation.  For example; if they say; “I put the boat out on the lake last weekend.”  Rather than responding with  something I did, I say; “Out on the lake?”  Then let them pick up the conversation.

Remember:  Let people fully express themselves.

Fall back or take the lead depending on your conversational partner’s desire to dominate.

Connect with what is on the other person’s mind.

For now, Earlynn’s Just Sayin’…….

Posted in Daily Thoughts, Self Improvement | Tagged | 1 Comment

Poor Planning

Posted on August 22, 2012 by Earlynn

Years ago I remember reading a story about a bricklayer.  I ran across that story recently and thought you might enjoy it.  This is a letter written to an insurance company about an accident:

“Dear Sir,  I am writing in response to your request for more information.  In block 3 of the accident reporting form, I put quote – poor planning – unquote as the cause of my accident. You said in your letter that I should explain more fully, and I trust that the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade.  On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six story building.  When I completed my work, I discovered that I had about 500 pounds of bricks left over.  Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley which fortunately was attached to the side of the building, at the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out, and loaded the brick into it.  Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope, holding it tightly to insure a slow decent of the 500 pounds of bricks.  You will note in block number 11 of the accident reporting form that I weigh 135 pounds.

Due to my surprise to being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.  Needless to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate up the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming down.  This explains the fractured skull and broken collarbone.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two-knuckles deep into the pulley.

Fortunately, by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope in spite of my pain.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground—and the bottom fell out of the barrel.  Devoid of the weight of the bricks, the barrel now weighed approximately fifty pounds.

I refer you again to my weight in block number 11.  As you might imagine, I began a rapid decent down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.  This accounts for the two fractured ankles and the lacerations of my legs and lower body.

The encounter with the barrel slowed me enough to lesson my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks, fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the bricks – in pain, unable to stand, and watching the empty barrel six stories above me — I again lost my presence of mind—I LET GO OF THE ROPE—-”

Poor planning, indeed.  Now don’t you feel better about your day?

Earlynn’s Just Sayin’…….

 

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Weddings, Weddings, Weddings

Posted on August 19, 2012 by Earlynn

Love is in the air.  I always thought June was the month for weddings, but recently Kerm and I have been invited to a lot of weddings.  I love the energy of weddings.  Couples begin married life deeply in love, full of expectations, and dreams for their future.  I recall my own wedding.  Kerm and I were so in love.  We were happy and full of anticipation. We had  confidence in our ability to conquer the world.  We didn’t know what our future would hold, but we did know we wanted to be together through it all.  We knew our children would be amazing.  We knew we would be excellent parents.  We would love our children so deeply they would joyfully do as we expected.  We knew all the right things to do.

Oscar Wilde said; “I’m not young enough to know everything.”  Well we WERE young enough to know everything, (or so we supposed). Kerm and I have often said it’s good we could not see our future and we did not understand how difficult raising children can be.  We’re not sure we would have had the courage to become parents.  Don’t get me wrong, our children are amazing and they have brought incredible joy into our lives, but we have also experienced the worry, the frustration and the pain of having our children test their limits.  Fortunately our children are all happily married.  They are responsible productive members of society and we love them dearly.  As I look at these young newlyweds, I realize it is good they are confident.  It is good their love is full of boundless energy.

Pierre Teilhard De Chardin, the French philosopher said; “Someday, after we have mastered the winds, the waves, the tide and gravity, we shall harness for God the energies of love.  Then for the second time in the history of the world, man will have discovered fire.

For now, Earlynn’s Just Sayin’

Posted in All in the Family, Self Improvement, Spirituality, Uncategorized | 1 Comment

My Ultimate Wish

Posted on August 15, 2012 by Earlynn

Have you ever given  thought to your ultimate wish for your lifetime?  My ultimate wish is to have the strength and courage to give my best to life;  that I can share the talents God has given me and be a blessing to others.  Each of us is given a unique set of  talents and abilities.   It takes all of us using our God given talents to create a peaceful and loving world and as we share our talents grow.  No one else has your particular set of talents. No one else can be you.   Never wish to be someone other than yourself.  To do so is to deny the special gift God has given the world…….YOU!  George Bernard Shaw wrote his thoughts so beautifully:

‘This is the true joy of life:  The being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a might one.  The being a force of nature, instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.  I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community, and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can.

I want to be thoroughly used up when I die – for the harder I work, the more I live.  I rejoice in life for its own sake.  Life is no “brief candle” to me; it is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for a moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.”

For now, Earlynn’s Just Sayin’….

Posted in Daily Thoughts, Self Improvement, Spirituality | Tagged | 1 Comment

We Are One

Posted on August 12, 2012 by Earlynn

You don’t need to look very far to see regardless of the problems we experience here in the U.S.A. we really enjoy a very good life.  This “good life”  brings with it a caution found in A Course in Miracles.  We are cautioned to keep a prayer of gratitude in our hearts always.  We are grateful for the many blessings we enjoy, but NEVER grateful that we enjoy more blessings than others.  Our prayer should be that all people enjoy peace and prosperity.  We are one with all mankind.  We cannot be happy that we have what others do not.  I am reminded of the beautifully written Meditation XVII by John Donne:  “No man is an island of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friends or thine own were; any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved I mankind; and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.”

Earlynn’s Just Sayin’

Posted in All in the Family, Daily Thoughts, Self Improvement, Spirituality | Tagged | 2 Comments

Leadership

Posted on August 8, 2012 by Earlynn

I don’t know about you, but I am getting weary of all the political hype being thrown around in the media and by the candidates.  If we demand our candidates and their super packs just stick with the facts it would be a lot easier for all of us.  There is enough to talk about considering the facts.   The facts will show the differences in ideology plain and clear.  But lies cloud our vision.  I get emails about the political candidates that are full of blatant lies.  Who sits around with nothing better to do than spread these lies?

God bless those honest candidates who are willing to submit themselves and their families to vicious attack for the sake of a better tomorrow.  Our country is at a critical cross road.  We need statesmen who are fearless and wise.  The solutions to our problems are present.  We must elect leaders who have the courage to accept things we cannot change,  leaders with faith and vision and  to make changes needed for our country to  prosper and leaders with the  wisdom to know the difference.   It is not possible for each of us to know all the extenuating circumstances within  our country’s problems.  Our form of government recognizes this.  That is why we are a republic.

Our duty as citizens is to elect honest people to public office trusting they will make the best decisions on our behalf.  Over the course of world history, the masses have been deceived many times.  That is why we must elect our very brightest, most honorable, and fearless  citizens to represent us.  God bless America.

For now; Earlynn’s Just Sayin

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A Masters Hand

Posted on August 4, 2012 by Earlynn

“Twas battered and scarred, and the auctioneer.

Thought it scarcely worth his while

To waste much time on the old violin,

But held it up with a smile.

“What am I bidden, good folks,” he cried,

“Who’ll start the bidding for me?”

“A dollar, a dollar.” Then two!  Only two”

“Two dollars, and who’ll make it three?

“Three dollars, once; three dollars, twice;

Going for three…” But no,

From the room, far back, a grey-haired man

Came forward and picked up the bow;

Then, wiping the dust from the old violin,

And tightening the loose strings,

He played a melody pure and sweet

as a caroling angel sings.

The music ceased, and the auctioneer,

With a voice that was quiet and low,

Said; “What am I bid for the old violin?”

And he held it up with the bow.

“A thousand dollars, and who’ll make it two?

Two thousand! Andwho’ll make it three?

Three thousand, once, three thousand, twice;

And going and gone.” said he.

The people cheered, but some of them cried,

“We do not quite understand

What changed its worth?” Swift came the reply;

“The touch of a master’s hand.”

And many a man with life out of tune,

And battered and scarred with sin,

Is auctioned cheap to the thoughtless crowd,

Much like the old violin.

A “mess of potage,” a glass of wine;

A game – and he travels on.

He is “going” once, and “going” twice,

He’s “going” and almost “gone.”

But the Master comes and the foolish crowd

Never can quite understand

The worth of a soul and the change that’s wrought

By the touch of the Master’s hand.  By Myra B Welch

Posted in About Earlynn, All in the Family, Daily Thoughts, Health and Wellness, In the Garden, Kerm's Korner, Look What's Cookin', Spirituality | 3 Comments

What’s in a name?

Posted on August 2, 2012 by Earlynn

Have you ever thought about what your name means to you?  It is said that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.  If you want to make a new friend, remember  his/her name.  So many of us have difficulty remembering names.  Why?  Could it be we are so busy trying to impress them we don’t take time to focus on their name?  Just think about it for a minute.  Isn’t it great when someone calls you by name especially when you’ve just met them?  It’s even more flattering when a new acquaintance takes care to properly pronounce it.   So next time you are introduced take time to imprint their name in your memory.  This takes time, but according to Emerson; “Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices.”

Earlynns Just Sayin’

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Please All and You Will Please None

Posted on July 29, 2012 by Earlynn

Remember Aesop’s fable about the man, the boy and the donkey?

A man and his son were once going with their donkey to the market.  As they were walking along by its side a countryman passed them and said:  “You fools, what is a donkey for but to ride upon?”  So the man put the boy on the donkey and they went on their way.  But soon they passed a group of men, one of whom said; “See that lazy youngster, he lets his father walk while he rides.”  So the man ordered his boy to get off, and got on himself.  But they hadn’t gone far when they passed two women, one of whom said to the other; “Shame on that lazy lout to let his poor little son trudge along.”  Well, the man didn’t know what to do, but at last he took his boy up before him on the donkey.  By this time they had come to the town, and the passers-by began to jeer and point to them.  The man stopped and asked what they were scoffing at.  The men said; “Aren’t you ashamed of yourself for overloading that poor donkey of yours – you and your hulking son?”  The man and the boy got off and tried to think what to do.  They thought and they thought, till at last they cut down a pole, tied the donkey’s feet to it, and raised the pole and the donkey to their shoulders.  They went along amid the laughter of all why met them till they came to Market Bridge, when the donkey, getting one of his feet loose, kicked out and caused the boy to drop his end of the pole.  In the struggle the donkey fell over the bridge, and his forefeet being tied together was drowned.  “That will teach you,” said an old man who had been following them; “Please all, and you will please none.”

So it is for all of us.  Follow your own best judgement and don’t worry what others think.  When you try to please everyone, you please no one especially yourself.

Earlynns Just Sayin

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Abundance

Posted on July 22, 2012 by Earlynn

We live in an abundant world.  Everything we need is at our fingertips.  Our problem is we do not always acknowledge what we need as opposed to what we want.  We want many things we do not need.  The key is in knowing the difference between a need and a want.  Several years ago Kerm and I spent a prolonged period of time in an unfinished basement bedroom.  Kerm and I were building our home and it took longer than anticipated.  We sold our previous home before the new home was completed and did not want to sign a lease on an apartment for what we thought was 30 to 60 days.  Our son, Troy, offered to let us stay in his basement.  Perfect, we thought!  There was only room for a box springs and mattress in the room.  We tied a rope across the basement for a clothes line, put all our necessities in a cardboard box and stowed  everything else in a rented storage space.  Well sixty days turned into six months.  The crazy thing about the experience is we discovered we really don’t need much to be happy.  A roof over our heads, food to eat, a car to get to and from work and a comfortable bed. When you get caught up in the wanting mode….remember nothing outside of yourself will ever make you happy.  Happy is a way of living, not a reward.  Keep your wants in line.  Yes, you can enjoy many things as long as you know you don’ t need them to be happy.  That’s the key.

For now, Earlynns Just Sayin’

Posted in All in the Family, Self Improvement, Spirituality, Uncategorized | 1 Comment