Mom is one of the dearest words in the English language. Just the sound of Mom evokes loving thoughts. When we fall or get hurt, Mom is the first to know. When we achieve something noteworthy, Mom is the first one we want to tell because we want her to be proud of us. When we need a shoulder to cry one, Mom is our first choice. When we are discouraged, Mom gives us hope to carry on. When we need someone to give an honest opinion, Mom will do that.
My mom passed on several years ago and yet she still influences my decisions daily. So much of who I am is because of who she was. Below are some special qualities she gave to me.
Gardening. Mom always had beautiful flowers around her home. She especially loved her Iris and Roses. For me there is nothing more rewarding that cultivating beautiful gardens.
Music. Some of my fondest memories are of our family harmonizing to Mom’s favorite songs as she played the melodies on her piano.
Vocabulary. Mom had a flair for words and enjoyed using an expressive vocabulary. Why use long sentences when one carefully chosen word can say it all?
Organization. Mom was very good at organizing. She had the ability to bring order to chaos. Everything in her home had a place and everything was kept it its place.
Spirituality. Everything Mom did was in alignment with her core values. Her spiritual values were operational 24/7.
Love. I knew Mom loved me unconditionally.
We all love our Moms. But in spite of that, psychologists tell us when they treat patients with mental dysfunctions, the number one culprit is Mom………..Things she did or did not do. It appears if we’re looking for someone to blame, Mom takes the number one spot. As I’ve said before, it is never what happened that upsets us. It is the story we tell ourselves about what happened that causes the problems. God knows exactly what He’s doing when He places us in families. If we are looking to escape responsibility for our actions, there are plenty of opportunities within a family to do so.
The truth is that we are all doing our best to accomplish what we think is best for ourselves. Although Mom has responsibility to care for her children, she also has a life and must care for herself. Everyone has a different point of view. We all perceive life through our limited perspectives. A child will see a situation and internalize it in a way totally foreign to an adult. Many debilitating beliefs are acquired when we are children.
As we mature spiritually, we come to realize that everyone is doing the best they can based on their current level of consciousness. When we know better, we do better. No one consciously chooses pain and dysfunction, but we do experience pain and dysfunction when we are run by our egoic minds. When we develop our consciousness and begin making decisions based on our higher self, we begin to live in the present moment free of pain and dysfunction.
In his book, The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle writes; “Nobody chooses dysfunction, conflict, pain. Nobody chooses insanity. They happen because there is not enough presence in you to dissolve the past, not enough light to dispel the darkness. You are not fully here. You have not quite woken up yet. In the meantime, the conditioned mind is running your life.
Similarly, if you are one of the many people who have an issue with their parents, if you still harbor resentment about something they did or did not do, then you still believe that they had a choice – that they could have acted differently. It always looks as if people had a choice, but that is an illusion. As long as your mind with its conditioned patterns runs your life, as long as you are your mind, what choice do you have? You are not even there. The mind-identified state is severely dysfunctional. It is a form of insanity. Almost everyone is suffering from this illness in varying degrees. The moment you realize this, there can be no more resentment. How can you resent someone’s illness? The only appropriate response is compassion.”
For now, Earlynn’s just sayin’; “Thanks, Mom, for all you have done for me. I love you dearly. I am truly sorry for any resntment I may have held believing you could have done anything differently. I pray my own kids will do the same for me, forgiving me for my moments of insanity.”
To order your owncopy of Earlynn’s Book, Transformed, just click on the ‘Earlynns Book’ tab to order your copy. Thank you. Gloria! In Excelsis Deo!